she smelled like a LAN party
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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