i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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