Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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