I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize