I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
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I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
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I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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