Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize