Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
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