can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize