dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize