How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
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