I bet he comes in French.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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