Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Randomize