Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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