The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called his prostate his "boner button".
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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