I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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