it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize