Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
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i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
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Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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