WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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