I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize