I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i just made my gag reflex go away.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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