She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
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Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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