I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
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He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
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Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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