Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize