I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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