that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
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