throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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