everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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