Is it because I queefed?
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
She's the barista slut.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize