Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize