All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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