i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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