i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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