I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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