New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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