I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
found the other keg... it's in the tree
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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