Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
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So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
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My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
ok first of all what the fuck
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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