so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
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