my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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