I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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