gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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