i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize