Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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