how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
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