you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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