I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize