if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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