It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
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I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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