he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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