did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize