I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
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The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
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I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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